WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING?

 
So, I never met Baba. Never wrote him a letter or received one. How am I hanging on? I'm not hanging on, I'm stuck on. People could easily get the idea that I'm an unwilling Baba lover, or "Baba Tryer" as I prefer to call myself. No, it just that I was unwilling to let go of that incredible piece of happiness, that unqualified stab of love that I didn't even ask for, didn't expect, and it's made my life, which I know to be as colorful as any, gray in comparison.

The key is that knowledge of his awesome power, awesome knowledge and bliss he enjoys; that flash, is the basis of the search for my true self.

It sounds light, even camp, but it's not. It's extremely heavy. I once said that about acid, this time I can feel the weight. Before any one man can get that one together, can ever find himself and know himself as Universal, he has to make his life work. Has to be right not wrong, fair not foul. He has to be up front. He is his own witness.

Baba helps. Meher Baba is there doing things for you and your life that you will never perceive. A mere twitch of his nose could split the planet, a twiddle of his finger could save your life. Luckily, his Infinite power is used in connection with an equally infinite knowledge and compassion. Baba rarely interferes. (I am only now repeating what Baba himself said.) Why alter events that occur in a system that is already self-perpetuating, self-correcting and self-destructive when it goes too far?

From the peace of the original note, the single unmultiplied breath of life, the eternal silent singing that pervaded all, came this. Us. What are we supposed to be doing? Here am I, in suburban Twickenham, skinny, vain, and obsessed by the word "forward"; how am I equipped to begin to understand Infinite Love?

Life under Baba's umbrella is more exciting than watching 2001. The music you hear in your head is more mind blowing than any cuts from any album. You hear and see what you need to hear and see. There's nothing more exciting and entertaining than knowing that the past wasn't wasted and the present isn't being wasted, and thus neither will the future be. Even when things don't go too well, you can somehow take it.